Well, it has become a very common thing amongst women. Their scars are holding them back from being great people that they are fashioned to be. I was a low self-esteemer some time back.
Thinking back to times when I exhibited signs of how little I valued myself. Wherever I was, I felt like somebody was looking at the extra fat under my arm, the braces on my teeth or the different eyes I have. One thing that seriously bogs my mind is that there is totally nothing I could do about that.
We tend to always be humiliated for the things we can’t change. You didn’t choose to be too tall, dark, short, stout, albino or too thin. You didn’t choose to have the facial deformities or to be disabled. There was a time I was overweight and got emotionally abused because of that. Growing up, tons of people would look at me and point fingers at my body. I always felt uncomfortable and as a result, I became self-conscious to every possible relationship I had a shot at and constantly thought society was judging me for who I was.
At a point, I felt as if all I did was a failure ,or would end up being one.
Although I wasn’t quite aware at the time but I was extremely introverted and shy. I would spend all my time alone, although surrounded by people, dreaming of the “could be” me. I experienced a lot of misfortunes due to my inability to appreciate myself enough and work towards achieving my goals despite of what people said about me.
I sat alone and thought, “What do I do now? How do I fight the low confidence disease so that I can stop it from tainting all areas of my life?”
For me building a sustainable confidence involved two main things:
1. Accepting who I was, the good and the bad.
I analysed my strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats. I began to realise how influential I could be. I began to realise how I could use my weaknesses to enhance my strengths. I started to unveil the story that was told by my scars and used it as a powerful tool to help other young women. What you undergo is extremely powerful and can transform the way people see the world. It is up to you to be strong enough to disregard these negative connotations others bring upon you.
2.Challenging the past and the beliefs I held about myself
That was the hardest part, but it is where all the healing happens. I built my self worth by letting go, by giving myself permission to move on, to be happy and to reinvent myself.
If, like me, you have lived under the shadows of self doubt and self unappreciation, you would know how painful low esteem can be. It may come with a myriad of other side effects like constipation, comparison to others, negative self image, “what are they gonna say” syndrome, mind trap, fear of judgment and criticism (even if it’s constructive) and various other effects.
Make it your choice today to free yourself from the yoke of low self esteem and let doors begin to open in your life