Apphia Hope Taropafadzwa Madondo

Well, it has become a very common thing amongst women. Their scars are holding them back from being great people that they are fashioned to be. I was a low self-esteemer some time back.

Thinking back to times when I exhibited signs of how little I valued myself. Wherever I was, I felt like somebody was looking at the extra fat under my arm, the braces on my teeth or the different eyes I have. One thing that seriously bogs my mind is that there is totally nothing I could do about that.

We tend to always be humiliated for the things we can’t change. You didn’t choose to be too tall, dark, short, stout, albino or too thin. You didn’t choose to have the facial deformities or to be disabled. There was a time I was overweight and got emotionally abused because of that. Growing up, tons of people would look at me and point fingers at my body. I always felt uncomfortable and as a result, I became self-conscious to every possible relationship I had a shot at and constantly thought society was judging me for who I was.

At a point, I felt as if all I did was a failure ,or would end up being one.

Although I wasn’t quite aware at the time but I was extremely introverted and shy. I would spend all my time alone, although surrounded by people, dreaming of the “could be” me. I experienced a lot of misfortunes due to my inability to appreciate myself enough and work towards achieving my goals despite of what people said about me.
I sat alone and thought, “What do I do now? How do I fight the low confidence disease so that I can stop it from tainting all areas of my life?”

For me building a sustainable confidence involved two main things:

1. Accepting who I was, the good and the bad.

I analysed my strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats. I began to realise how influential I could be. I began to realise how I could use my weaknesses to enhance my strengths. I started to unveil the story that was told by my scars and used it as a powerful tool to help other young women. What you undergo is extremely powerful and can transform the way people see the world. It is up to you to be strong enough to disregard these negative connotations others bring upon you.

2.Challenging the past and the beliefs I held about myself

That was the hardest part, but it is where all the healing happens. I built my self worth by letting go, by giving myself permission to move on, to be happy and to reinvent myself.

If, like me, you have lived under the shadows of self doubt and self unappreciation, you would know how painful low esteem can be. It may come with a myriad of other side effects like constipation, comparison to others, negative self image, “what are they gonna say” syndrome, mind trap, fear of judgment and criticism (even if it’s constructive) and various other effects.

Make it your choice today to free yourself from the yoke of low self esteem and let doors begin to open in your life

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There was a time in my life when I lost direction. I forgot my purpose because of circumstances and tough situations I was going through. I took giving up as the best option. I became suicidal because I felt like I had noone, even if I was surrounded by a lot of people.

Suddenly, something from within softly spoke to me. It enlightened me about how strong I was, stronger than the problems I was facing that were meant to make me even stronger. I don’t know if this is going to sound crazy. I looked into the mirror and I got myself together. I was willing to completely die to any form of me that I had been, so that I would birth the woman that I was becoming. I was willing to get out of any toxic relationship I was involved in. I was willing to walk alone. I allowed myself to feel the pain after falling, and became bold enough to keep moving with one broken leg, I had to better limp for miles than to not get up.

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Dear strong woman….
It’s okay to be not okay
It’s okay to feel like you are the only one living an awful life
Falling can be an option when you feel weak, but what is important is getting up and resuming your journey from the last step you had, but before you get up, check out for what made you fall.

I want you to realise that you have not come this far to only come this far. You have not invested so much time, dedication and hard work in creating something huge for yourself and in turning your dreams into reality only to give up.

Don’t you dare think about giving up!

You could be only a day away from succeeding. This life is yours to deal with. Only you have to choose weather you want it to be a failure or success.

Sooner or later, you’ll just be fine.

Stop spending time planning on what you are gonna so after failing,rather focus on making your dreams a reality, focus on making something work and push forward. The reason why most women don’t become what they want is that they are too attached to who they have been and yet you hear it all the time when they say I’ve always been like this. They let situations define them. They become what the world is persiving them to be and let their dreams fade away in the process. They unknowingly give up in their future.

I want you to realise that making your dreams a reality is supposed to put you to trial over and over again. It is supposed to hurt. Imagine pouring your heart into something and you don’t see it happen the way you had planned it. It surely hurts. This is the point where others choose to throw in the towel. #DARE TO BE DIFFERENT

This is where the grit comes in, you gotta keep going even if you don’t see any changes!
Just be the best version of yourself, leverage the lioness traits in you and never give up.

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