mental health

Lately, I am finding joy in the little things I had forgotten to do. I remember when I used to watch the much loved series “Being Mary Jane ” the character played by Gabrielle Union would put colourful sticky notes on her mirror to remind herself of certain things. Mainly these sticky notes had quotes that also helped her to make decisions during difficult times. I used to think 24 hours was too little. A part of me still does. Then a little voice in my heart reminds me that it’s actually more than enough. What we lack is balance, discipline and prioritisation. I believe.

I am not sure if it’s the purpose we are pursuing or money, or legacy that keeps us so busy. We want it all, right? Petrol in South Africa recently went up several times in the 1st quarter of 2022 affecting everything else financially. The cost of living has gone up. So on top of chasing dreams and careers there is that sharp unavoidable reality , we have to live and we must be able to afford our very own existence. This then gets us into that rat race of chasing the money. I also find that the young and modern African woman is on the drive to achieve her dreams at peak as soon as possible. In this race you can potentially neglect yourself and those around you. So how do you achieve balance and how do you prioritise?

  • What moments are important to you? How often do you do these things? Basically what is your happy pill? 
  • How much of YOU do you keep to yourself? 
  • How much time do you invest in things where you are not remunerated? 
  • How much time do you invest in your community? 
  • How often do you volunteer your time or skills towards the upliftment of teenagers and women? 

My 2022 started on a high note and I am still excited about the rest of the year. About 3 months ago, I started to notice that I was dropping the ball and starting to have a monotonous routine and at night I am just burnt out and all I want is to sleep. So I took a mental break, just a moment to reflect. I then went back to that happy place that replenishes me and allows me to take a few steps back and BREATHE! 

Here’s my list of the things I do as much as I can to balance my life.  

I look forward to weekends so I can play with my son. I don’t plan as many events or outings at this time. 

I enjoy reading. Even if it’s one page per day or week. I will make time for it. My mind needs an escape . It’s a constant battle. Sometimes I forget but at the most I will set a reminder for this. 

I take time away from my desk at work to actually eat. I had developed a habit of eating at my desk and not taking  a moment away from work. This is not healthy at all. It increases burnout. 

I am starting to collect graphics of the art I love and saw myself collecting. I love art and I need to see it in my room, on my phone, on my laptop screen cover etc. Art reminds me to continue dreaming and that everything I want and believe in is possible. Remember the saying “out of sight, out of mind”? If the things you aspire to do or see are not in front of you everyday it’s easy to forget them. Never undermine the power of hope and faith. 

I call and check on people I appreciate every now and again . Touching base with family or friends or old colleagues is good for us and vice versa. Sometimes going down memory lane and having a quick recap of the mischief you and your cousins got up to or office politics etc is all we need. The world has become more and more distant with social media. Even though it connects us, it is also the very distraction people use to disconnect from the world.


I sleep. People often say if you sleep you have no problems. I can sleep in the midst of turbulence. Once I decide that I need a mental break, I just take a nap. Even in the middle of the day. I learnt a long time ago that some things in life resolve themselves. Sometimes I won’t have all the solutions even to my own challenges. So sleep allows my mind to rest. If you are at your best mentally you see things from a different angle therefore whatever solution you can bring to the table will be from a healthy mind. I am so selfish with my sleep that after 9pm I switch off my data to avoid notifications coming through. That little time I have I don’t take for granted.

Lastly, I am intentional with the content I choose to consume. I don’t miss an opportunity to watch comedy, go to Tik Tok or YouTube in search of something to make me laugh. I might be stating the obvious but when was the last time you had a good laugh that made you cry till your lungs hurt



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